Messenger Theatre Company presents Season Three of The Dragoning
Episode Eight: Very Interested in Dragons
(The first few notes of the piano sound nice and theatre-y but then they start to deconstruct, a bit like a music box going awry. Strings come in. Men droning. Are they monks?)
EMILY:
Messenger Theatre Company presents
Season Three of The Dragoning
(lots of voices saying The Dragoning. The beat drops. There are some distorted strings or cries in rhythm.)
EMILY:
Episode Eight – Very Interested in Dragons
Dylan, Sgt Ana Rengel and Harrison
(The music sputters out.)
*
(sound of dragon roar. Sound of a Zoom dial up. TV Producer announces Dylan and Brent on the line.))
DYLAN
Brent!
Thanks for checking in with me, Brent. I appreciate it.
Let me tell you – these guys are very interesting, Brent. If they didn’t want to kill your girlfriend, I’d introduce you. But they definitely want to kill your girlfriend which is a pretty major strike against them for me and a dealbreaker for you, so I definitely won’t even invite you. But I bet they think they could convert you, even so. These guys have confidence that you would not believe.
Well, they have all these plans. It’s hard to tell which ones they mean and which ones are just talk.
Sometimes the other guys are into something – and sometimes it’s just me and the undercover officer. And I tell you what, I do not want to be in one of those situations where they decide to do something because the law enforcement guy encouraged them to.
Oh, you know, I’ve heard way too many stories about groups that were all talk who then had weapons and supplies and plans made for them by the undercover guy. We’re not doing that here. I hope I made myself clear to the team about that. Because, I mean, these guys are assholes, there’s no denying it and we know they’ve done terrible things in the past – but I draw the line at setting them up.
Because it would just make more jerks like these – and if they’ve got a sense that they were set up, they get stronger – so much stronger.
The plans these boys would like to implement are plenty dangerous as it stands. I’ll let you watch the show. If they leave out any, I’ll let you know.
I mean, I tell you what – it is weird as hell to be inside a hate group.
Well – because in a weird way, it’s all love in there. I mean, highly toxic, macho love – but love. There are guys in there who might just be experiencing belonging for the first time. I think it’s mostly why they’re there, honestly.
I mean, me, I’m a pain in the ass, I know I’m a pain in the ass but I’m a pain in the ass who knows my father loved me, you know? I’m not a pain in the ass because of lack of love. This is just my personality. And some people love me anyway.
Yeah – people like my parents.
I don’t need to hate anyone to feel connected to other people, you know?
but even if the dragons were just animals – would it make sense to be a part of a hate group about them? I mean – would anyone form a Tiger Hate group? It’d be weird. You don’t like Tigers – just don’t go to the zoo – you don’t need to form a club about it, right?
Even rats…rats are pretty universally disliked but I never heard of an anti-rat group. I mean – if you don’t like them – sitting around talking about them once a week would be the last thing you’d want to do.
That’s why I’m convinced these guys are actually, deep down, very interested in the dragons. I think this hate is a cover and actually they’re, like, attracted to them.
I think that’s why they’re so fixated on you.
Because they wish they were brave enough to connect with a dragon. They’d never admit it. And I’m not a psychologist or anything, but it feels pretty obvious to me that these guys have some deep down interest, you know. Maybe they had terrifying mothers, I don’t know.
Never read any Freud, no.
What do you know? Maybe I should go become a Freudian analyst! I’m a natural.
No, no, I feel perfectly safe in there. They’re just sad dudes with a fair amount of charisma. I feel fairly certain if they used that charisma on women instead of men we might not be having this conversation, none the less be in the middle of a TV show about them.
Yeah, yeah, it’s a misdirected charisma hose. They’re just aiming its power in a stupid direction.
Nah, I feel for them, you know. It’s kind of sad. They can only succeed in this one environment and I sympathize you know? There but for the grace of Brent, go I!
They like me to be surprised so all I can tell you is that there have been some absolutely reprehensible plans floated inside there and if any of them can be prosecuted, I suspect there are a lot of people ready to move on that.
I mean, as far as I know, the main issue is that dragons are legally unprotected, as dragons, but the minute the crime is against the woman, that’s when they can get you.
Dragon justice looks a lot different than your regular run of the mill person justice – so even if these guys don’t cross the line of going after women instead of dragons, the dragon justice might still come for them.
I mean, something’s coming for them, I think, even if it’s not official. Even if it’s a couple of producers in costume uniforms, this audience will demand some kind of consequences.
No, no, it’s not airing yet. That would be too risky. My cover would be blown. No – but there’s a test audience, sworn to secrecy.
I don’t know – maybe they’ve got them sequestered, like a jury?
Can you imagine? They’re like – we’re putting you up in a hotel just to watch TV every so often.
Right? Quite a holiday. I’d take that deal.
But yeah. That’s the audience we have now.
And my understanding is that those folks will be ready to riot if we don’t see some justice.
*Uh- Dylan
Oh, I guess I’m not supposed to talk about those folks. I’m constantly tripping up over what I’m supposed to say, not supposed to say.
I guess I’ve always been that way, that’s chiefly how I made my reputation as a world class pain in the ass. But the good news here is that I have someone in my ear teaching me when I cross a line. If I could have had that in my youth, I think I’d have had a very different experience.
*Dylan
They don’t like it when I talk about the mechanics of making a TV show. I’m told it ruins the illusion of the viewing audience.. I guess they’re supposed to imagine this is all happening in real time and they’re just the fly on the wall – but meanwhile, there are writers on this show! Did you know they have writers on reality shows? How crazy is that?
Oh, they’re definitely going to cut this.
I guess I’m a little unleashed today because I’m talking with you. When I’m with the group, I have to be very careful.
For the cameras, sure – but also for my safety. And for Ashley’s safety, too.
How is Ashley? Is she okay?
I’m so glad. And I’m so glad I got to meet her. It really does help to keep her in mind when those guys start railing about how the dragons are animals – and dangerous predators at that. I just picture Ashley and how sweet she was to me and it helps me get through those moments.
No, I know even she could be dangerous. But you know, I keep thinking of all the dangerous men that women have been with, never knowing when they might snap. Somehow women have managed to spend time with monstrous men over the years, why can’t we do the same?
Yeah, I’m trying to learn. I think I’m evolving a little bit. I’m a pain in the ass but I’m not the worst.
Tech sound
I guess they got what they wanted with this. Anyway – Brent, thank you for bringing me in. I hope to do right by you and Ashley, okay? I just want you to know that.
Just in case they edit me to seem like some bigot who is out to get you. I want you to know from my mouth right now that I’m deeply grateful to you and for you, no matter what the edit is.
Oh, you know, they may do a mid-season reversal on me.
It’s where they make someone seem like a real jerk and then shock everybody when they do something nice. They warned me. They might end up using that strategy if they need to milk more drama out of a scenario.
No, the only reason I’m worried about it at all is if somehow you guys believe it. So that’s why I’m telling you now. We’re in the real life edit and I wouldn’t want any reality show tricks change your opinion of me. Even if that opinion is just “What a pain in the ass that Dylan is!”
No, I am. It’s fine. But I’m not a dragon hater. That’s the main thing.
Thanks, buddy.
Stay safe out there!
Sound of a dragon roar. Sound of the police station
Sergeant Ana Rengel
There he is.
Thanks for coming, Brent. I know you’re busy.
So I asked you to stop by because that little incel group is starting to get a little dangerous
Well – Brent – I’ll tell you – and this is between us. We’ve discovered that several men in that group are members of the police force. This makes matters very sticky.
We had planned on just proceeding through the legit established system. We thought it might be a good idea in the eyes of those who are a little prejudiced against dragons. But it has become clear that there are an unusually large numbers of officers in this group. So once again, the Dragon Defense League has to the save the day.
The plan is to make arrests on charges that the regular force will have to accept and then hand them over.
Well, you didn’t hear this from me, but there is a kind of officer code in place which will keep us from hauling in our fellow officers – but this should encourage them to turn witness. And if we help them save everyone, they can even pretend they were part of the sting all along.
No, no. None of that is really why I wanted to talk to you – but it is important background. Because the thing of it is, the plan they’re cooking up involves you and Ashley.
I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news but I feel very strongly that it’s better for you to know than not.
I’m going to want you to be on high alert, okay? Don’t go anywhere with anyone you don’t know.
Well – they want to kidnap you both. I’m not clear what their plans are once they have you but it’s surely not to throw you a party. They mean trouble. Are they capable of implementing it? I don’t know. My position is to just assume they are and make extra sure we have you and Ashley under protection.
I mean we already have an eye out – but with those new developments – we’re going to have eyes on you 24-7. So if you feel like someone’s watching you, you’re not paranoid, we are, in fact, watching you.
I know it doesn’t feel great to be surveilled but just know that we’re doing it to protect you
We’re not going to do this in secret, though. I want you to know what everyone looks like so if you see someone ELSE following you or staking out your house or anything of the sort, you can let us know.
Okay – these are the cars you might see – these are the people. They’re not going to be dressed like cops so just expect these faces but in, like, hoodies and baseball caps.
Try not to make contact with any of them unless it’s an emergency. We don’t want to tip off the bad guys.
Yeah, it can turn out badly. That’s why we do this now. And if we send in someone new, we will definitely let you know so you don’t see someone new and go, “Oh, I don’t recognize that person – must be a new guy.” We will always tell you when there is a new guy.
I’m glad.
No, no. I’m not glad you’re in this situation of course but I AM glad you’re nervous, because if you’re nervous, you’ll be on your guard and that’s where I need you both to be.
But remember too, these guys are aiming for both of you and I don’t know if they remember that Ashley is a dragon so it is more likely that she will harm them than the other way around. The odds are that it won’t go well for them.
Well, I’d advise you to stick close to Ashley if you can – for both of your safeties.
Get to know our guys and our cars – and call us about anyone else.
No, we do know what the guys look like – but I don’t want you two looking out for them because I don’t want you mixing up the good guys and the bad guys
You ever see an actor from a TV show out in the world?
Right. Because you thought, “Hey I know that guy” long before you realized why. And if you’re in a conversation with them trying to work out if you went to high school together before you figure it out. I’m trying to avoid that conversation for you. Recognize our guys, assume everyone else is trouble. It’s simpler. Safer. That’s what I want for you.
No, that’s true. Ashley is my main concern. But you are her main concern so you become a concern for me, too.
Sure, if I was in a position where I could only save one of you, we all know who I’m going to choose but I’m hopeful it won’t come to that.
I’m glad you don’t take that personally, Brent. That’s what I appreciate about you.
Yes, right. You would ALSO save Ashley first.
And listen, I’m not a big fan of men, but I think you’re okay.
Well – you know Brent – most men are just too emotional and too afraid to admit it.
I’ve never seen a dragon angry. I mean – in her woman form
Yeah – but have you seen Ashley, in her Ashley form, get mad about something?
Right. She doesn’t get mad; She turns dragon. If someone in her life before had given her space to feel rage, she might not have turned.
Oh well – I never had trouble feeling anger. I’ve been furious most of my life and while you’d never know it in public, I long ago learned how to go home and smash any glass on hand.
I mean, have you seen the world?
You have then.
Yeah.
I mean, we’d have gone after those guys ages ago but we struck a deal with the TV people and we have to wait for them to get all the footage they need.
We’re impatient to neutralize the threat of these guys but we recognize that the longer we wait, the more evidence gets collected, the more rope there will be with which these guys will hang themselves.
It’s a trade-off – for sure – but if we hadn’t partnered up with the TV people, we wouldn’t know half or even three quarters of what’s going on in there. I feel fairly confident that this arrangement is going to pay off.
Sure – exactly. It is very important to know who to worry about within the force. No internal affairs investigation could have found that out. For all we know, some of those internal affairs guys are also closet misogynists – and some of them aren’t so closeted. Yeah…so it’s all for the best I think. We just have to be patient.
I’m not so patient myself but I’m working on it, you know.
Alright, Brent – you take care of yourself. And keep taking care of our Ashley. And you know what to do if there’s trouble.
*
Sound of a dragon roar. Sound of the Talon TV office
Harrison
Jaden got you some water I see. Good, good. We want to make sure you have everything you need.
No, no. Your contracts are all sorted. Your agent is on top of everything. We’ve got your travel arrangements in progress and your itinerary getting ready for your approval. We just need to get the crew hired and organized and we will be ready to start having some meetings!
No but I want I wanted to talk with you about is a little – I don’t know – sensitive?
About the last few episodes of this other show.
Oh yeah, I heard they’ve got a protection team on you two, I was glad to hear it – no, no, what I wanted to ask you about is a whole other thing.
So, we heard through the grapevine that you and Ashley have a connection in the dragon burlesque scene and we all just thought how amazing it would be to get some footage there.
Right. Got it. She’s Ashley’s friend.
Well, to be honest. We’re a little scared to talk to Ashley. She’s a dragon after all.
No – of course we know phone is a perfectly safe way to communicate with a dragon. I don’t know why the team is so weird about it – but they wanted me to ask you first.
I don’t know, man. It’s a different world out there and you seem to be a good translator.
I mean, I guess this dragon burlesque situation is a little confusing because, like, are these ladies…dragons…being objectified? Will we upset them if we want to film them?
Oh really? I can respect that. I guess they’re not going to be satisfied with exposure, then, are they?
No, no. I’m joking. They sound very savvy. Like – probably they won’t turn dragon if we depict them in a sexy light but they WILL dragon out if we try to lowball them on a contract.
I’m getting the situation.
Oh, they have an agent? Like, as a collective? Wow. They’re much more ahead in this market than I would have thought. I should talk to their agent then.
No – what we’re hoping to do is shoot you and Ashley at a show. You know, show you going out, living a full happy life while the guys over there in the group are getting increasingly more narrow in their outlook.
I won’t try and spin it. Boobs sell and if we fold a little sexy business into this story, the marketing team will have a much easier time of it.
Oh, the writing team will be so mad that I led with the marketing. The writing team feels like seeing all these dragon women so comfortable with their bodies and sexuality will be an incredible contrast to the incels in the hate group. Like, they feel that it will be a really – oh what did they say? It’s a literary term
Well, it’s like when two things are the opposite of each other but in a literary way. Shakespeare used it a lot apparently.
Yes! That’s it – ANTITHESIS! They want to get some antithesis going. I think the idea is to show how sexy and liberated the lady dragons are compared to the narrow repressed hate group.
But the boobs will also help
Right – well I’ll see if they’re up for it – and then we’ll check in with you and Ashley to see if you’d be willing to come.
I think this could be good for all of us in the end. Just people helping people. Dragons helping dragons.
(Dragoning theme credit music begins. Strings. Bells. It’s a little creepy but also fun. Like mischievous creatures sneaking around after midnight.)
EMILY:
The Dragoning is created by Messenger Theatre Company and written by Emily Rainbow Davis
The Dragoning Theme was composed by Scott Ethier
Sound design by Matt Powell
Show art by Shannon Harvey
Produced by Kayshana Johnson
This episode featured Jeff LaGreca as Dylan, Vickie Tanner as Sgt Ana Rengel and Aaron Sinn as Harrison.
Messenger Theatre Company is a not-for-profit organization and we are entirely reliant on your support.
Thank you in advance for making our next project possible.
Stay safe out there everyone. And watch out for dragons.
(Music resolves.)